Went in to kiss my son goodnight. 'Take a look at the picture, Mum.'
This is Frankenwhore, apparently. Some quick decisions to make; it's late. Obviously he has copied this from the Internet and it throws up at least a dozen issues, all of which need careful thought in terms of presentation since my son, Flint, is autistic and has a low level of comprehension.
'Well, it's a really good picture but that's not a very nice name.'
He still looks pleased with himself. 'I like her hips.'
'Uhuh, but it's a bit horrible, asking people to have sex like that?' Alright, alright, I said it was late.
'Ok, Mum.'
'You know one day when you will have sex with your girlfriend, you'll be in love.' Oh jeez, it’s not that late! What the hell am I saying? 'And when your parents have sex, they love each other, just each other. I don't ask lots of people to have sex with me, do I?' I now ask myself the same question that he asked his science teacher recently: Have you lost your mind?
Flint still seems very happy with the world and I leave him. On my way to our room, I remember that he caught us - this has never happened before, that he caught us, I mean - last month on holiday and I wonder... He'd stood in the doorway, arms folded and said 'Are you two having sex?' Quite a lot of surprise, and interest, in his voice.
I actually pulled the covers over my head and said, 'Yes?' Then unrhetorically, 'Is that ok?' I looked out from the sheets at his lopsided grin. He said, 'Yeah', and wandered away. Later in the day, I told him casually that sex is private and this is not the sort of thing you tell everyone about. Not, for example, at school.
Generally, Flint, who is 15, doesn't like to talk about sex. He says he would like to do that one day but not yet. He might make an exception for Britney Spears though I think he genuinely thinks more about just kissing her. Flint told me last year that he wouldn't be able to make love to girls when he is older because they would slap his face.
So there's some kind of monster here and I hope I didn't do much by way of its creation.
(Frankenwhore also makes an appearance in ‘Piano from a 4th Storey Window’ but I must stress that this is not an autobiography, almost wholly not.)
Flint still seems very happy with the world and I leave him. On my way to our room, I remember that he caught us - this has never happened before, that he caught us, I mean - last month on holiday and I wonder... He'd stood in the doorway, arms folded and said 'Are you two having sex?' Quite a lot of surprise, and interest, in his voice.
I actually pulled the covers over my head and said, 'Yes?' Then unrhetorically, 'Is that ok?' I looked out from the sheets at his lopsided grin. He said, 'Yeah', and wandered away. Later in the day, I told him casually that sex is private and this is not the sort of thing you tell everyone about. Not, for example, at school.
Generally, Flint, who is 15, doesn't like to talk about sex. He says he would like to do that one day but not yet. He might make an exception for Britney Spears though I think he genuinely thinks more about just kissing her. Flint told me last year that he wouldn't be able to make love to girls when he is older because they would slap his face.
So there's some kind of monster here and I hope I didn't do much by way of its creation.
(Frankenwhore also makes an appearance in ‘Piano from a 4th Storey Window’ but I must stress that this is not an autobiography, almost wholly not.)
